The first night I banged you
by scaryand damaged
Summary: Alicia and Will use their romantic past in court, but will they manage to stay on top of their feelings and attraction? Seduction is a very dangerous game to play. Based on the sneak peek for David and Golliath
1. Chapter 1

**A/N That sneak peek inspired me to write this. Spoilers only for the sneak peek of 5 x11 and for season 2 finale.  
**

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**_"_**_So you decided to change?" Will asks Alicia._

_"Yup, into what I wore the night you banged me the first time," Alicia responds._

Will looks at her shocked. She rarely adressed the fact that two years ago they had a thing and certainly the crude, flippant way she was referring to their affair made it sound more like a business transaction that anything else.

_"That's pretty low of you," Will says._

_"I know. I wasn't so discriminating back then," she responds. _

She walks away exuberant that she stunned him into silence. She enjoys this mind games with Will. Trying to up each other is so thrilling and the spur of the moment, she decided to go for the gut. Like Will had used their affair, when he questioned her about Matthew, she decided she would distract by wearing the exact same suit he had peeled off her their first night on the presidential suite.

Will behind her bounces with enthusiasm. He had told Diane before he wanted Alicia in his head. The mind battle with her is so frustrating and yet so wonderfully enternaining. She is his sworn enemy and that sets the stakes very high. When he gambled he always got off on high risk games. Battling with Alicia in court was just like that. He was high on adrenaline.

They both went to courtroom. Alicia sat down and when Will started talking she crossed her legs provocatively stroking her well formed calves. Will swallowed a lump on his throat. _His mouth was on her calves, kissing her behind the knees, as he took off her panties. _He shook his head and barely managed to continue his sentence and form a coherent argument.

Then came the cross examination of the witness. This time Alicia played with the buttons of her jacket. _He opened the buttons slowly..  
_

Stop! Will berated himself. Behave yourself. You can do this. He turned his back on Alicia and continued the cross._  
_

As he sat down, a brilliant idea occured to him. Seduction was a two way street, Mrs Florrick. And despite the low standards Alicia claimed to have before, he wasn't fooled. She had wanted him that night and she had had a very pleasurable night. So, if the memories plagued him, then he would turn the tables on her.

He drops his pen near her leg. As he bends to pick it up his fingertips graze "accidently" her leg. Alicia caught off guard shivers. Bingo, Will thinks.

Then he starts very slowly and deliberately to stroke his pen up and down like he had stroked her thighs their first night just as Alicia is about to object. Her objection dies in her throat and she stares at him agape.

What the hell? Alicia thinks frustrated with herself for losing this battle. I had him, how did this happen. She swallows hard as she feels herself getting wet. She has to gain control of the situation. She flicks her hair to the side exposing her creamy throat to Will. The pause in his speech reassures her that she had struck gold. But as Will sits down its payback. Very slowly and discreetly he sucks slightly on his index finger and rubs the side of his throat. Alicia's breath cathes. _He was behind her helping her get rid of her jacket. He pushed her hair to her side and asked to suck on his finger. She did_. _He took his wet finger and slided it up and down her throat._

They were both breathing heavily. It was getting harder and harder to focus on the trial. The judge called them to approach the bench to discuss the admission of a piece of evidence. Will and Alicia ended up side by side. Heat was coming of waves. Alicia expected he would try something to turn her on. Maybe graze her breast or something. But she didn't expect him to grab her hand, without looking at her. T_hey were in the elevator and she was panicking. Was she really doing this? She called in an attempt to escape. Very discreetly, he reached for her hand and squeezed her fingers. It was all she needed to calm down. Will always had this ability. To calm her down, to make her relax. _

Alicia shook herself out of the memory. This wasn't a game anymore. The hand holding was intimate, personal. She felt like crying.

Will had paled as well. He didn't know what got into him when he grabbed her hand. She was standing next to him, looking ahead, wearing the white suit. It felt like deja vu.

Someone, Alicia asked for a break. He grabbed his things and got out behind her. He saw to turn right into one of those personel only rooms. He just stood there frozen. Should he go after her or not?

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So what do you think Will should do? Please please please review I am not sure what I am doing here. I was going for a much lighter story and it came out angsty. Also tell me if you want/mind that the next chapter might be M-rated. (either by memories or reality, I don't know yet). So I am waiting to hear what you think. You know me 5 reviews new chapter.


	2. Chapter 2

**Warning! This is smut. Hide the children.**

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Alicia locked herself in the personnel room and took off her jacket hastily. The jacket had been clawing on her skin. She was shaking. She could practically still feel Will's fingers grabbing hers in the courtroom. She took a deep breath and tried to control herself. She pushed Will out of her mind. That was the main reason she had left. Provoking him with their sexual history had been a grave mistake she wouldn't repeat. On a whim, she called Peter, thinking she could drop by during lunch maybe let him take some steam off. Unfortunately he wasn't available.

So, Alicia settled for the next best thing. She lifted her skirt and slipped her hand into her soaking wet panties. She played a bit with her clit, applied some light pressure, and then slipped two fingers slowly into her wetness. Against her will her mind procured Will's image on their first night. She groaned but didn't fight. She was too far gone. She remembered Will offering her some champagne as soon as they got in. She remembered the light, playful kissed he dropped on her lips. The intoxicating scent of him surrounding as he took of his jacket and tie. The way he hugged her from behind pushing her hair out of the way and kissing the base of her neck, a spot that had her arching her back. How did he know she had wondered briefly, when it took Peter 5 married years to discover that spot?

But there was no time for wondering for Will had already taken of her jacket and was unzipping her dress. He teased the tips of her breasts over her bra making her nipples harden. Alicia had sighed in pleasure and sank deeper into him. That was when he removed her bra and guided her gently towards the bed. She lied down and helped him get out of his shirt. She remembered running her fingers all over his chest. He was so smooth, smoother than Peter. Will bent his head on her nipples and sucked one of them making her back arch of the bed. He grinned like a pirate and made a trail of kisses towards her navel. And then lower. And then he stopped altogether and left her whimpering. He moved to her thighs and removed her stockings, one at a time again kissing the inside of her thighs and the sensitive spot behind her knee. Alicia was blinded by the intensity of her need for him.

Then, finally Will made his way to where she needed him the most. He blew some air on her clit and she shivered. Then he got to work. His tongue was inside her at a slow torturous pace. He was acting like a man experiencing a very expensive meal and he was determined to make the experience last. When she couldn't take it anymore and she felt ready to explode he stopped. Alicia felt like struggling him. Every nerve ending in her body was begging for release. She looked up and saw him undo his belt. She sat up, not very elegantly in her extremely aroused state and slapped his hands away. She had a very great curiosity to see what his dick looked like. Given his contests she had high expectations. She helped him out of his pants and his boxers and took out his erection. God, he was big, not so much in length but width. She stroked with her hand a couple of times, marveling at his smoothness and then took him into her mouth. She had never enjoyed a blowjob so much. Will wasn't pushy, he kept his hands behind his back and he didn't thrust. On the other hand, his breathing had gotten heavy like he had been running. The power she had over him, thrilled her and aroused her. At some point, Will pushed her gently away and picked his wallet fishing for a condom. Alicia wondered what his type would be. Was he the kind of guy who preferred to be on top or bottom? Neither as it turned out. The moment Will sheathed himself; he sat cross legged on the bed and motioned for her to come over. She lowered herself slowly on his erection. She felt stretched to her limit like she could feel him in her nostrils. Slowly, extremely slowly, they began rocking. It was less moving and more synchronized breathing. He breathed in and she breathed out and it was the most amazing sensation. He moved inches back so that his hand could provide stimulation to her clit. This became Alicia's undoing. She came, screaming his name. After her orgasm had settled down, she realized Will was still very aroused inside her. He tipped her over so that lay on her back and lifted her knees towards her chest. He went faster than before and this position gave him deeper access and soon she was coming again taking Will with her.

Alicia in the present came with a whimper. She buried her head into a pillow and tried really hard not to sob. It had been an amazing night. When she asked him breathless, how much practice he had, he answered "I had been dreaming of this moment for a long time. I came prepared" and kissed her. And now, now they ended up playing power games like children who were too immature to talk to each other. She got up feeling drained and tried to make herself presentable. Unfortunately, she had no time to change.

Will stood undecided for a moment and then shook his head decisively. No, he thought, I am done with Alicia Cavanaugh. Enough is enough. He called Isobel, telling her he had some time off and maybe they could do something productive together. There. Every problem had a solution.

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**A/N My first smut ever... Sound off. Is it too cheesy? I chose to picture just Alicia's POV because we saw Will's in the Decision Tree**

**And second. Do you want this fic to continue? (I am not sure how but tell me anyway)**

** Thank you so so much for the reviews. I was really moved which is why this is coming up so fast. **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N So this chapter is angst. Be aware.**

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Will came back from his tryst with Isobel feeling more tired than ever. He was exhausted. Isobel was fun, but he was getting older. It was time for him to get over it, as Alicia herself had told him a few hours ago. But how could he do that when all he could see when he closed his eyes was Alicia confirming she was leaving?

The rest of the trial was uneventful, apart from some sour glances from Alicia that made him suspect that she knew how he spend his free time. Honestly, he didn't care. It was none of her business whether he was getting laid or not. Right now all he craved was some peace and quiet. He would pour himself a nice scotch and sit on his couch to look over some contracts.

However when he went back to the firm, he saw that his wish wouldn't be granted. A very serious looking Diane cornered him when he was entering his office and went in shutting the door behind her. He hadn't seen her all day. She had a deposition in the morning and he left with Preston, before her return.

"Diane" he greeted her as he took off his coat.

"You joined forces with Preston so that you could go after Alicia?"

"And Cary." Will added tired. "It is a good suit Diane."

"From which we, our firm gains nothing. So basically you are wasting your time and losing money to get what? Some stupid, high school revenge?"

Will was silent. "No, not exactly. I mean yes watching them lose gives a sort of primal satisfaction."

"Her" Diane interrupted.

"Sorry?"

"Watching HER, Alicia lose. You don't care about Cary."

"True. But it is more than that. I need to prove to myself that I know her well enough to beat her. That I wasn't a complete fool. I need to know that professionally at least I was right, I knew her."

Diane sat down on his leather chair and accepted the glass of scotch he offered. Her previous annoyance was replaced by a look of deep concern. She drank a sip and chose her next words carefully.

"Will, I know we are not where we were two months ago, before that stupid interview. I also know I have avoided the topic of your relationship with Alicia like the plague, but that doesn't mean I am blind or unfeeling. Lately, I have been walking on eggshells around you, because I didn't know how to approach you. I put up with Damian, I put up with you making out with that stripper in broad daylight, I put up with your crazy moods, I have even put up with the fact that you seem to forget the fact that I am a name partner and you make all the decisions alone, telling me after you are done. I put up with all these because I know I did a terrible, stupid mistake and I need to work to make my claim to this firm and to you. But enough is enough. This cannot continue. Get drunk, get laid, go throw stones at her door and come back as my partner. I miss that guy."

"I am not sure I can find him again, Diane." Will said sadly. " I am sorry for not consulting you and for forcing my decisions that will stop. I think somewhere deep down I didn't trust you. And you are right, I cannot continue like this. But the thing is I don't know how to continue. My relationship with Alicia has been one of the few good things in my life. It reminds of a simpler, happier time and now its gone."

"You are a good person. And you will find someone who will appreciate it."

"Yes, Dr Phil."

Diane laughed. "Have you eaten?" When Will shook his head negatively , she said "Me neither. Let's grab a bite."

* * *

Alicia left the courtroom shaking in anger. How dare he? He had sex it was obvious. She was tormented by the memories and he was getting laid.

As she sat in the car then she remembered another night years ago when she and Will had kissed in his office and then she confused and horny had banged Peter just to calm down. She realized how hypocritical she was being blaming Will for doing the exact same thing. Jesus Christ, it was supposed to get better. This is why she left the firm. Yet somehow this rivarly between them was proving more erotic than their companionship.

Absorbed in her thoughts she was suprised to bump into Eli. "What?" she asked rather aggressively. Eli had nothing to deserve her tone but she was having a horrible day. Whatever Eli, Peter or the Governor's office needed would simply wait. "Is this a bad time?" Eli asked hesistantly.

"I cannot do anything today."

"Well, you don't have to do anything. It's something else."

Something in Eli's tone caught Alicia's attention. She softened her tone and said. "Well, I am here, you are here, shoot."

Eli braced himself and said. "Marilyn is naming her son Peter."

Alicia looked at him in horror. "No, not again"

"Alicia, he claims nothing happened and its a consequence."

"Do you believe him?"

"It is not my place to doubt him" Eli answered diplomatically

Alicia understood. "Eli, I won't be holding his hand in that press conference. I am telling you so you can be prepared. I betrayed..." Alicia stopped herself before revealing how much betraying Will had cost her.

"What if there is nothing behind this?" Eli asked

"You wouldn't be here, if you really believed that"

"Alicia..."

"Goodbye, Eli. Thank you for telling me."

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**A/N So what do you think? This is a filler chapter you will see Will and Alicia moving in opposite directions. **

**I had planned this to be a two shot but your wonderful wonderful reviews kept me going.**

******I have tr**ied to answer to all of you in PM. But I want to thank Bad Wife, Tiffany, Karolina, Guest and MayAnderson19 for reviewing.

** Just one thing you want a happy or an angsty ending? Angsty this story finishes in two- three maximum chapters. Happy will take at least 6 more and I am starting my postgraduate degree next week so expect slower updates.**

**P.S. English isn't my native language, so if anyone would like to proof read it, I would be very grateful.**


	4. Chapter 4

"You believed I slept with her?" Peter asked shocked.

"Yes I did" Alicia answered too tired to deny anything.

They had just found out from Eli that another Peter was the father of Marilyn's baby. Alicia thought she should be relieved. She wasn't. She was in a catatonic state where she felt she was living someone else's life. It was just like watching a movie. Nothing felt real to her. Not even Peter's justified hurt.

"How could you?" he was asking her now.

"I just did. It made sense to me. She is good looking so of course you would be attracted to her."

"So I would have left her pregnant?"

"I did wonder what made you careless. But then I have been careless myself so it made sense."

"You mean with Will?" Peter asked angry

"No, I mean with you. Can we have a conversation about us without you dragging Will into it? He is not to blame for every problem in our marriage. For instance, he had nothing to do with you banging Kalinda or Amber."

"We had this conversation already. You said you forgave me."

"I have forgiven you. I am not angry with you any more, I am not hurt. But I am still betrayed Peter and I still don't trust you."

"Then what are we doing here Alicia?"

"We are two adults, who have two children together. Sex whenever happens is fun and we both benefit from our liaison."

" This is not a marriage, this is a business transaction."

"What did you think we had, Peter? Did it feel to you we were as before the scandal?"

"No, but you refuse to move from that point. I was hoping we had made some progress."

"You think I don't want to? I have tried to fall in love with you again so hard. I have tried to go back and delete everything, but I cannot. I am not that woman I was when I was your wife. I have changed Peter. I want different things."

"I know that Alicia and I enjoy that. I like that you are working, I enjoy watching you having power."

"You mean it turns you on."

"Yes, is that a bad thing?"

"No, of course not. Except sometimes I feel that we have sex when I have fight with someone. You never approach me just because. "

"I don't know how to approach you. After the scandal we had sex one time, when you came into my room that night. Then we resumed marital relations because your mother told you to divorce me. Alicia I love you, but if you are staying married to be to prove that you are not Veronica..."

"It's not that. I just... I made a vow. I am commited. This is who I am."

"I am not encouraged." Peter said darkly

Alicia sighed. "Please I am trying here and I care about you."

"I know honey. What I don't know is are we married for the right reasons?"

"What are the right reasons?"

Peter took a moment.

"You sit on a porch, on a rocking chair 30, 40, 50 years from now. You are old and grey and you have lived your life the best way you know how. Who sits next to you? Do you tell your grandchildren how happy you are, how happy the man next to you has made you? Don't answer me now. Think about it. Think about it hard. If you cannot see anyone or if you cannot see me, then we need to consider our future."

Alicia didn't dare to even think about it. The thought of the future was terrifying. She didn't make those kind plans for herself.

"Peter, this is some romantic notion. Romance is easy. It is the parent teacher conferences that are hard."

"Romance is easy? No, Alicia, true romance not the silly Hollywood type is the hardest to achieve and the most precious to hold. The rest is just... routine. Romance is the spice of life. The rest you figure it out. You argue, you have difficult moments but at the end of the day, at the end of the road, romance wins."

Alicia was silent. "Not for me, Peter I am sorry. Perhaps it's Veronica I don't know. But for me romance is the last thing on the list."

"Then, how can you be happy? I mean truly happy. The kind of happy that bloats your heart. Alicia you are not Veronica, I am not your father and Zach and Grace aren't you and Owen. I mean you saw them during our separation. They did fine. They know that no matter what, they will always come first in our hearts. You are afraid of becoming a selfish mother, so you don't strive for happiness but for stability . I on the other hand grew up in a house with no romance. I don't want that. I don't want my children to grow up like this. I want them to embrace happiness. I want them to seek happiness. Do you think you can be this happy with me?"

Alicia closed her eyes. The porch was there and the rocking chair and Zach and Grace, all grown up but it wasn't Peter beside her. He deserved the truth and the chance perhaps to be happy.

"No." she said sadly.

"Then we have to do something about that." Peter said gently and hugged her.

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A/N I am not sure about this. See, I am a Willicia shipper but I understand Alicia's reasons for being with Peter. And I always agreed with Veronica that _Alicia would never leave Peter._ So this chapter came from Veronica's line in 4x09 and some interviews where the Kings say that_ Alicia has one love in her life and unfortunately it is not her husband_ and that _Alicia is still at the original mindset that her husband betrayed her._ I hope it wasn't terribly OOC. 

Thank you for the amazing reviews. I am really waiting to hear what do you think about this chapter.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N This chapter was been written, deleted and re written at least 10 times (in case you were wondering why I hadn't updated this is why). I considered including the latest development in the show regarding Peter (I am not saying what in case someone hasn't seen the last two episodes) but I decided not to. It simply didn't work out in my story. I might do an one shot or two shot or something like that with all the versions I have written.**

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Alicia woke up in the morning feeling for the first time in a very long time extremely calm. Today, she would stand by Peter's side and they would announce their divorce. Six months had passed since the talk. They had talked together to Zach and Grace, who were upset but not suprised. As Zach had said, they actually divorced 5 years ago. Eli had orchestrated the announcement in a timing suitable for Peter. Alicia would stand by his side and support him. Always the Good Wife.

On the other hand, a friendly divorce benefited her as well. A lot of the clients, would be upset not to have the Governor's wife represent them. Alicia had actually prepared new business cards. Cavanaugh, Agos and Associates. She had thought about keeping the Florrick name and Peter had said he was ok, but somehow she felt the need to become Alicia Cavanaugh again. Cary had panicked, when he heard she was getting divorced and they were changing names, but she had asked him coolly whether it was her skills as a lawyer or her name he was after when they became partners. Cary told her the first of course, but the second was a nice advertisment. She softened and told him she needed to do this by herself and make something of herself. She needed to rule the world alone, without Peter's name or Will's protection. The next day Cary gave her a business card with the name Alicia Cavanaugh on it. She had nearly cried.

Suprisingly, she had seen Will just a couple of times after that steamy and sad afternoon in court. He seemed to change tactics and he was never first chair in the cases they had against each other. So, she hadn't seen him in three months, 10 days and 5 hours, not that she was counting. But his absence had hit her harder than she thought. She had loved their games and even the constant bickering and undercutting was better than nothing. It was odd considering they had gone up against LG 5 times in those three months and it was always Diane she was seeing. Once she had asked her if everything was all right, but the other woman hadn't offered any information.

Absorbed in her thoughts, she didn't hear Eli approaching. "Are you okay?" he asked. She smiled at him a bit sadly. "Do you remember when you used to lay on my couch?" "Happy times" he chuckled.

"The first time we met you told we were going to be great friends. I didn't believe you. I was wrong. Sorry. I am no longer Peter's wife but you will always be my friend" Alicia put her hand on Eli's forearm.

Eli was silent like he was struggling with something. Then he said. "Before you make that promise, I have a confession to make that might change your mind regarding the friendship thing. Do you remember Peter's press conference, when he announced he was running for State's Attorney again?" Alicia nodded.

"You were on the phone with Will, I grabbed your phone and pushed you on the stage. Then I listened to Will's second message and I deleted it."

"What?" Alicia choked. "This is why I never got the second message?"

"You knew there were two?" Eli asked suprised.

"Yes, I did. My God, Eli why?"

"Because all I cared about at the time was Peter and getting him elected. I couldn't do that without you. I liked you Alicia but not enough to risk the campaign. I wouldn't make the same choice now."

Alicia was quiet. "Ok Eli. We are fine." "Really?" "Yes. I am not going to hold a grudge for something that happened years ago and Will and I had our shot and we didn't make it." Eli opened his mouth to say something but Peter showed up. He kissed Alicia on the cheek, held her hand and for the last time they walked together to the podium. It was over quickly. Peter was with Zach and Grace in his office, they were spending the night with him. She kissed them goodbye and got into the elevator. On the next floor, Eli got in.

"So, tell me how can a man tell you he loves you and has loved you for twenty years and he will do whatever plan you want for a chance to be with you and yet somehow that is not enough.I mean what do you women want?" Eli half joked

"What are you talking about?"

"Will's second message."

"He said he loved me since Georgetown?" Alicia asked with a distorted voice.

"I thought you said you knew." Eli asked confused

"I knew it existed and it said something passionate, but Will never told me had he had said, when I confronted him."

"But you guys, I mean when..." Eli trailed off unsure.

"Yeah, there wasn't much talking involved." Alicia answered referring to their liaison.

"So, now that you know what are you going to do?"

"I don't know. Too much has happened." Alicia answered

* * *

Will's phone rang pulling him out of a file he was reading.

"Hey." he said jovially

"Hello stranger"

"How are you?" Will asked

"Good and you?"

"I am fine. So what's up?"

"Nothing, I am just sitting here, drinking and I wanted to hear your voice."

"I am glad you called."

"Oh, did you hear the latest?"

"No what happened?"

"The Florricks divorced."

Will was silent.

"Will?"'

"I am still here, Diane. Too little, too late. I am not coming back. My life is in New York now."


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N Sorry hectic life. I swear I will try to update more often**

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Alicia spent the next month trying to find Will. She called his cell, his office to no avail. She needed to talk to him, asked him if he had meant and why he lied. It might be too late, but then again she needed to know. It was important to her to know that once he hadn't hated her. Maybe it would open old wounds, but perhaps they could both finally move on and let go or not. The future was hazy to her. She sure as hell wasn't ready to jump in a serious relationship so soon. But she missed Will and it was about time they had an honest conversation. So after all her attempts at locating him failed, she went to his apartment. It was dark, so the next logical step was Lockhart/Gardner.

The security guard asked her name and made a call to whoever was upstairs. Alicia held her breath afraid they wouldn't allow her in. They did and she found Diane waiting for her when she exited the elevator.

"Alicia, what's the problem?"

"Diane, sorry to disturb you, but actually it's Will I am looking for."

"I am afraid you cannot see Will. Can I help you?"

"No, Diane you cannot. This isn't about a case. I need to talk to Will." Alicia answered a bit annoyed at her former's boss persistance.

"Alicia, you cannot see Will. Will isn't here. He is New York."

Alicia blinked. Oh of course. LG had a new brand there.

"When is he coming back?"

Diane looked at her. "Alicia, he isn't coming back. He is running the branch. He has been living there for 4 months." Diane said kindly.

Alicia looked at her shocked. "What?" she spluttered,

"He decided he needed a change. To start fresh." Diane explained.

Alicia wanted to laugh at the irony. Of course, he would be in N.Y. They had bad timing, they always had bad timing.

"Is there a message I can pass on?"

Alicia shook here head negatively.

Diane sighed as she watched Alicia walk back to the elevator in a daze.

Then she went to her office and dialed.

"Hey Will?"

"Diane, hi. Burning the midnight oil again?" he teased.

"I am. Look, I know I am intruding here, but Alicia just came by looking for you."

"So ?" Will asked coldly

"So, I thought you should know. She looked very upset that she couldn't find you."

"If she really wanted to find me, she would Diane. And I left Chicago to get away from her, so this conversation is really unneccesary."

"Yes, but the circumstances are different."

"What the divorce? So, because she is single, that means she didn't backstab me?"

"That's not what I am saying."

"Then, what are you saying, Diane?"

"I am saying you shouldn't let your ego and your pain cloud your mind."

"Diane, it's over. Whatever she wants, I cannot give. Please leave me alone. I came here to calm down."

"Ok, Will. I am not bringing her up again. I only have your best interests at heart, you know that."

"I do. So tell me how is David Lee? I almost miss him."

Diane laughed and started discussing the office gossip.

* * *

A week later, Alicia still was upset by the turn of events that prevented her from talking to Will. Eli was at Florrick/Agos and noticed her bad mood. As he was leaving he said. "If he doesn't talk to you he is a jerk."

"He is New York. For good."

"What? When did he leave?"

"4 months ago according to Diane"

"So?"

"So nothing. This is another glorified example of our bad timing."

"Sure, if that's your excuse"

"I beg your pardon?"

"You can whine all you want about bad timing, but New York is two hours away. If you wanted to talk to Will, you could. But you are avoiding the conversation, because it will yield uncertain results and you are not a risk taking person."

"You don't dictate my life anymore, Eli." Alicia said angry.

"No, I don't. I am just calling it as I see it." Eli said and left.

Alicia was angry at Eli all day, but at night when she was in bed alone with a glass of wine she pondered over his words. What if he was right? What if bad timing was an act of cowardice and avoidance? She scrolled her blackberry and booked a flight to NY for Friday.

* * *

Will went back home late on Friday evening. Opening a new branch required a lot of work and he wasn't 25 anymore. On the other hand, working was good. Working meant not thinking. He had told Diane the truth. He needed to get Alicia out of his head. Problem was after 20 something years, it was hard. Especially now that she was single. It made him wonder sometimes, what if he called her. He would have, a few years ago. But now the gap between them wasn't just her marriage, it was her betrayal. It was personal. She went after him, she chose to betray than trust him and that was the main issue. He parked his car and shook his head, trying to clear his mind. He would drink a beer and watch some TV. He got out of the car and froze. The woman he was trying to get away from was sitting on his doorstep.

"Hello" Alicia said nervous.

"How?" was all he could say.

"Diane told me you are in New York and your adress was in the catalogue"

Will stayed silent and tried to gather his thoughts.

"I am divroced now." Alicia said

"I know. This is a mistake. You shouldn't have come."

"Aren't you curious about why am I here?"

"Not really. Everytime you and Peter have a problem, I am the solution, either professionally or personally. He gets himself in jail, you come to me for a job. You separate, I am the rebound guy." Will shrugged. "Now you are divorced, I am guessing comfort sex?"

"You cannot really believe that." Alicia said shocked."Peter and I were doing fine when I kissed you in your office, when I kissed you in my office, when I kissed you in your car. Will I didn't come to you because of Peter, I came to you in spite of him."

"Even so, why is this important anymore? I have moved on and so should you. Goodnight Alicia" Will said and tried to move past her.

"Why did you lie to me?" Alicia blurted out.

"Excuse me?"

"When I asked you about the second message you lied to me. Eli deleted that message and he told me what you said."

"Alicia, it was another lifetime."

"Don't you ever wonder what might have happened if I had listened to that message? or if you had told me the truth?"

"No, I don't. I know what would have happened. We would have some hot sex, I would be the dirty secret on the margin of your life and then it would get too much for you and I would end suspended."

"There is another version of that story."

"No there isn't. I stopped believing in the other version the second Diane told me you were leaving the firm."

"You told me you didn't regret it." Alicia said.

"I didn't at the time. Now I do."

"Will, please hear me out. "

"Why?"

"For old time's sake." Alicia said feebly.

"Alicia listen to me carefully. I left Chicago, so that I could keep my sanity and dignity. I was going crazy and I knew it. Your betrayal tops the worst moments of my life, and I unlike you didn't have the luxury of staying at home, or being protected by both my name and connections and an old friend. I have been betrayed many times, most of them by people I considered friends. Yet somehow you managed to make it to the top of the list. The old times you mention don't exist for me anymore. They were erased by your actions. So forgive but I won't listen to you. In fact, I would be happy if I never saw you again. If you ever felt anything for me, then this is how you prove it. Leave me alone."

Will was breathing heavily. Alicia looked at him stunned. He had expected him to be angry, but he wasn't angry, he was resolute. He wanted nothing to do with her. She swallowed back some tears and took a tentative step towards him.

"I know you won't believe me, but I was always very much in love with you. Goodbye Will. Please be very very happy." she leaned forward kissed him on the cheek and left.

* * *

A/N. This is the angsty ending. If you want angst don't read further. Also, REVIEW. It really makes my day. Thank you all for reading.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N Apologies to everyone. I am in the middle of exams and I really have no free time**

* * *

Will tried not to think. He did everything possible not to recall Alicia's words. To not feel her lips on his cheek. He worked crazy hours, went running every day, but nothing helped. Every night when he closed his eyes he could see her face, hear her voice and feel her lips.

So, when Diane said she needed him in Chicago for a meeting, he went back feeling both aggravated and excited. Kalinda was waiting for him at the airport. If he was honest, he missed Chicago and the firm. Working with Diane, sharing their thoughts over scotch, waiting for Kalinda to crack a case open. He even missed David Lee's sheningans.

Kalinda being Kalinda picked up there was something wrong. "How is New York?" she asked as she was driving him. "Good." and at her raised eyebrow he added "I am still getting used to it. The new branch, new associates, new judges."

"So you miss us? That's it?"

"Yeah, it feels odd coming back."

"You heard about Alicia's divorce" Kalinda said and it wasn't a question.

"Diane told me."

"Cary says she was doing great until last month. She took a day off and when she came back she was very gloomy."

"Cary says?"

"We have drinks from time to time." Kalinda answered "And don't change the topic."

"What topic?" Will asked mastering his best poker face

"Alicia's trip."

"What about it?"

"Did she come to see you?"

"Cary says that as well?" Will said

"No this is all me."

"Why is this important?"

"Why are you avoiding the topic?" Kalinda asked back

"I am not avoiding anything." Will answered.

"You are not answering, either." Kalinda noted.

"Look, we are here."

Kalinda smiled but decided not to press the matter further. Will would tell her in his own time. In some ways they were both alike.

They rode up the elevator in silence. It was late in the afternoon, so the front desk was quiet. Will greeted a few associates, shook hands with some partners and headed to Diane's office. He paused for a moment and realised he had missed her. Her heels off, her glasses on, hunched over paperwork. As if she felt him, Diane raised her head from her papers and smiled her glorious warm smile.

"Hello." he said solemnly.

"Hello. May I offer I drink?"

"Please do." he said and set himself on her couch loosening his collar, as if nothing had changed. As if he hadn't left. They clinked glasses and went over the agenda for the meeting. They shared stories about cases and employees and gossip. At the end, Diane told him a hilarious story about going fishing with Kurt. He was huddled over with laugher imagining her in boots and ragged clothes. Then they went quiet.

"We are the last ones here." she noted quietly.

Her words took him back to a different night with a different woman and he felt his breath catch.

He must have zoned out, because Diane touched his forearm with a worried look.

"Alicia came to see me in New York. Told me she is in love with me." he said and it was quiet.

"And you?"

"Told her it was too little, too late basically."

"Is it?"

"I don't know Diane. I wish I did."

"Do you intend to find out?"

Will shook his head.

"I cannot go through this roller coaster again." he said

"Can't or won't?"

"Meaning?" he asked her

"I think you both can and want to. But you are terrified and with good reason. Alicia has screwed you over many times."

"And you suggest what? That I dive headlong again and if I crush is no big deal?"

"I am suggesting you are happy and you don't seem happy to me. "

Will pondered her words in silence.

"I am going to need some assurance, like I don't know. No secret affairs."

"You are having a discussion with the wrong person. You are both lawyers, Will. Negotiate. Find the middle ground that makes you both comfortable. That's all this is. Another negotation." Diane smiled

"But the stakes are much higher." he mumbled.

"Says the man who gambled $45,000 from a client's account." Diane teased good naturedly.

Will smiled and turned to her.

"Are there any photos of you fishing?"

* * *

The next morning Alicia was the first to arrive in the office. She was on a rough case, but that wasn't her biggest problem. The conversation with Will kept repeating on her mind. Sometimes she just felt like giving up, other times she got stubborn and wanted to fight. She was stuck in between, with many emotions, unable to make a decision.

Cary walked into her office to talk about some paperwork. As he got up to leave he said nonchalantly,"Oh, did you hear? Will is back in town."

Alicia started. "For good?"

"I don't know."

Αlicia was astonished. He was back and he hadn't made contact. So maybe this was sign. She would give up.

She went home that night, luckily the kids were with Peter, drunk a lot and fell asleep.

Next morning she woke up, looked herself in the mirror and told herself sternly. "Ok, today is a new day. You can do this."

She felt encouraged by her pep talk and grabbed her coffee to go. As she was at the door, her phone rang and her heart stopped when she saw the ID. Will.

* * *

I am so so so sorry. My postgraduate degree got a bit crazy (10 hours a day, 7 days a week crazy) then I got sick, then I lost my inspiration and then wouldn't let me upload. So again apologies. I will try to update faster I swear.

I started this story as a two- shot so I am not sure how am I doing, because I don't really have a plan in my head. This is why I am begging for feedback. If this gets too unrealistic please let me know.


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